What Have I Done for ME Lately?

I am posting this just as I am taking off for a month in Martha’s Vineyard. I’m taking the time to be alone and to write. I’m excited and nervous at the same time, as I have never done anything quite like this before, and I have never been to the Vineyard. Yes, I have gone to writers residencies, but I have never embarked on real solitude. It’s a commitment, I won’t lie. Although a family friend gave me a good deal, I am still shelling out a few bucks on the rental. I’ll have to get there, which means I had to get my car (affectionately known as “The Bucket”) serviced, and there is just also the realness of preparing to leave home for a month.

Why all the drama? Why not just set up a DIY writing clinic in my apartment. I do have a dedicated room just for writing. I’m getting away because I feel that I am been distracted from myself by my life. I have been way too busy being too many things to too many people and I have really gotten out of touch with my work. I know that this happens to everyone, but I feel particularly frustrated because I spend so much time telling other writers to put themselves first. But here I am, in the same trap as everyone else.

I am trying not to set goals in terms of word count. Although, I want to challenge myself, I don’t want to crack the whip. I want to be motivated by the story, not by people telling me how long it has been since my last book, not by the ticking of my tenure clock. The only thing I am committing to is to sitting down for five days a week and spending at least two hours working. I know two hours seems like a modest commitment when I have all day, but I figure two hours is enough time to get the fire burning if it wants to burn.

I’ll still be blogging, but probably not as much. I imagine there will be more post about the nuts and bolts of writing a novel, as less about the business of being a novelist, which is probably a good thing.

Preparing for this trip feels so different than other times that I have gone away. Maybe because there is nothing in it for me but peace and quiet. There is no resume line to be gained. I am not nurturing a fantasy about meeting people or making contacts. I feel like I am preparing to meet up with an old friend, and that old friend is me.